About Joe Evans

Cereal has been a part of my life for as long as I could begin eating solid foods as a child. After all, cereal is part of a complete breakfast (or lunch, dinner or snack). With my propensity to always want to try and newest, most odd-sounding cereal, I figured what better way to share my experience than with you via this blog.

If AEW Wrestlers Were Cereals

Posted on April 12, 2024 by Joe Evans

Welcome to the first installment of “If AEW Wrestlers Were Cereals” where I combine a couple of hobbies: cereal eating/reviews and professional wrestling. The premise is simple, I picked 18 AEW wrestlers and matched them to cereals I thought fit their characters and personalities. Without further ado, ring the bell and let’s get it going!

Samoa Joe and Cap’n Crunch go hand-in-hand. Joe is the captain of the ship as the current AEW Wold Champion. He’s a savvy veteran with a stout build and like Cap’n Crunch can tear up the roof of your mouth, Samoa Joe can rip any opponent to shreds.

Timeless Toni Stom and Life Cereal may seem like an odd pairing, but hear me out. What cereal is as timeless as LIFE? The cereal hasn’t aged in all these years, and you could indeed describe it as timeless, just like Toni.

Bryan Danielson as Grape Nuts – need I say more?

The current edition of The Elite (Mathew and Nicholas Jackson and Kazuchika Okada) are a powerful trio with a brand so powerful that it dominates globally. So what cereal trio is better to be than Rice Krispies’ Snap, Crackle and Pop?

Mercedes Mone’, the CEO, brings a big personality and a global brand. So, you’d assume I’d pick a flashy cereal to be her counterpart, I chose the No. 1 cereal seller globally, Cheerios. It’s untouchable and a leader among others. A true CEO of cereal.

Will Ospreay is the aerial assassin with infectious energy and athletic ability unmatched. When I think of those qualities and cereal, I automatically think of Tony the Tiger and Frosted Flakes. And like Frosted Flakes, this brub is f’n Grrreat!

Julia Heart is the princess of the black throne and keeper of secrets. Whatmore, she often overwhelms her opponents with mist, mind games and tricks. She’s no silly rabbit, but I’m pretty sure she has every color of mist to match the Trix cereal pieces.

Danhausen is very nice and very evil and to me he is very Count Chocula. Just look at him, what other cereal would you think of first when you see Danhausen? Maybe it’s the cape that really brings the two together?

We know whose house it is (Swerve’s house!) and just like Swerve is a household name in professional wrestling, it only makes sense that he’d be a household cereal like Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

Much like how the OG, Cinnamon Toast Crunch is a classic household name, Thunder Rosa is one for AEW. But la mera mera brings some spice and edge to the ring with each and every opponent. So I’m going with Cinnamon Toast Crunch Churros for her.

Harley Cameron as Cocoa Puffs, you know, because she’s cuckoo (don’t tell her I called her that though)

To me, when I think Darby Allin as a cereal I think of a sugar rush with as fast and reckless he operates in the ring. What comes to mind is Sugar Smacks with its mascot Dig’em.

Willow Nightingale is one-of-a-kind. A powerhouse with personality and positivity. You could say she’s a unicorn in the industry. Therefore, I chose Kellog’s Unicorn cereal for Willow.

Kris Statlander can be sweet and occasionally bubbly outside of the ring, but inside she’s pure power and grit. So when you think of a sweet cereal that’s rough and tough, but can pop with color, you have to think of Cap’n Crunch’s Crunch Berries

Orange Cassidy as Fruit Loops —need I say more?

Abadon is the living dead girl, so what better cereal for her to be than Carmella Creeper cereal, the cereal whose namesake is a zombie character.

I chose Golden Grahams for Deonna Purrazzo. The main reason is when I hear the words “Golden Grahams,” I think gold and I see gold in the future for The Virtuosa.

Skye Blue as Boo Berry, because, you know, she’s somewhat spooky and is also blue. I tell you, some of these just write themselves.

And that concludes my first edition of “If AEW Wrestlers Were Cereal.” There was no real scientific method used to choose which wrestlers and which cereals paired, other than my own opinion. There’s still plenty more talent on the AEW roster to match with cereals, so if you read this article, I’ll eventually do another.

Silly rabbit, Trix LOADED is for someone else

Posted on February 4, 2024 by Joe Evans

This Trix cereal isn’t your grandfather’s Trix. Because we live in a world where good enough can’t be left alone, and the pursuit of bigger and better is constant, we’ve gone from mini cereal to now LOADED cereal, with this offering from General Mills, Trix LOADED.

Trix is one of three cereal varieties that has received the LOADED treatment, in addition to classics, Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Cocoa Puffs. Each is basically the same size and shape but flavored as usual. The kicker is that LOADED cereal means you get vanilla creme filling in each bite. So does having a little shot of creme in the mouth with your breakfast cereal make a difference enhance the experience?

Aesthetics

As evident from the cereal box, you can already tell that Trix LOADED looks nothing like the traditional Trix cereal we’ve grown up with. They’ve taken it to the extreme.

Instead of fruity shapes, we get large rectangles that look like leftover accent/throw pillows from the Hannah Montana craze. The large blue, red and what I can only describe as blurple-colored squares look like rocks that belong in an aquarium instead of covered in milk in a cereal bowl.

Each piece has a sheen and texture that looks rough, like Cap’n Crunch. Needless to say, each spoonful of Trix LOADED is a mouthful and then some.

Snackability

Trix LOADED is actually pretty decent to eat dry, if you enjoy berry-flavored cereal. I liken it to eating Crunchberries from Cap’n Crunch, minus the hardness. The only trouble you may have with eating this cereal dry is the size of the large pieces, that mimic the size of frosted shredded wheat. For that reason, may smaller children shouldn’t eat this cereal as a dry snack.

Structural Integrity

I think it’s been 4 years since I’ve awarded only 1 spoon in a category, but unfortunately, this is where I find Trix LOADED to be at its weakest. The large, light crisp flavored, almost airy pieces taste good, but after 5 minutes in milk, they soon become more mushy and overtaken by milk absorption.

Cereal Concept

General Mills has a history of creme-filled cereals (see Fillows), and there’s a reason why none really had staying power.

Trix LOADED sounds like something from an extreme era of the early 2000s. After doing Trix minis they overcompensate with this. Frankly, it’s more just using the Trix brand rather than doing something extremely different. Call me old fashioned, but I like it when the classics stay true to themselves, but I understand the business side of things of trying to evolve.

Flavor

Opening the bag, I didn’t note a strong scent of berry-flavored cereal. It wasn’t until biting into a piece that it reminded me of that Crunchberry flavor, sans the sandpaper texture of a Crunchberry. After eating the cereal both dry and in milk, it’s certainly sweet, as you might expect. I ate two bowls of it and my mouth still has that aftertaste.

But let’s talk about the elephant in the room that makes Trix LOADED loaded. The vanilla creme filling in each piece works well with the cereal, making it even sweeter than usual. It seemed to work better when activated with milk, in my opinion. Either way, the creme flavor wasn’t dramatic or overpowering like you’d imagine based on the depiction on the box. Each piece has very little of it, actually.

Final Thoughts Trix LOADED isn’t inventing the wheel when it comes to offering cereal with a vanilla creme filling. And for me, it was barely Trix as I knew it. It could have been any other berry-flavored cereal due to its unrecognizable shape and color. So while it doesn’t hit the nail on the head in breaking new ground, it does accomplish giving consumers a berry sweet treat with each spoonful. Does this make me want to try other LOADED varieties? Probably not, unless someone can for certain tell me that Cinnamon Toast Crunch LOADED tastes like a frosted cinnamon roll. If so, then we can talk. For now, leave well enough alone when it comes to the classic cereals. If we want to go wild and bold, then give me the whacky flavors, or create cereals that we’d never think should have ever been made into cereals.

Is this cereal spooky good, or does it put the boo in Boo Berry

Posted on October 29, 2023 by Joe Evans

It’s spooky season, so what better time than now to do a review on a classic cereal with a twist. Many of us are familiar with seasonal classics such as Boo Berry, Franken Berry and of course Count Chocula. So what does Genera Mills do? In recent years, the brand decided to make a mash-up and now we have Monster Mash Remix that now features the newest monster character, Carmella Creeper. Before we dive into the review, you may be asking, “Who the heck is Carmella Creper?” Well, Carmella Creeper is a DJ who apparently is the long-lost cousin of Franken Berry.

Now that is out of the way, what does a bowl of this cereal taste like? Is it more than meets the eye, or is it more a trick than a treat?

Aesthetics

The seasonal cereal features all your favorite Halloween cereal mascots you’ve grown up with, along with Carmella Creeper. The box touts there are four different marshmallow shapes and then purple and green ghost-shaped cereal (what would have been great is if the marshmallows were monster-sized, meaning bigger than typical marshmallow pieces you find in cereal like Lucky Charms. A boy can dream, right?

Overall, the box tells you that there’s a monster mash going on and it appears they’re having a graveyard smash dancing. I guess I should also add that Fruit Brute, the werewolf, and Yummy Mummy are also on the box, but not really a part of the cereal, much like the Count.

Snackability

This may be one of the stronger categories for this cereal. I’d say it’s on par with something like Lucky Charms if you eat that dry, but instead of solid oat pieces, you get a lighter crisp of cereal pieces with the berry ghosts. It almost reminds me of little snacks toddlers eat (not that I’m suggesting you feed this to toddlers). I will say it has a rough, slightly frosted texture, but I didn’t find it as routh as cereal like Cap’n Crunch.

Structural Integrity

The weakest of the categories for this cereal. The light, airy, berry-flavored pieces invite milk to saturate them and any flavor that was there initially dissipates.

Cereal Concept

Mixing cereal is always a fun idea, and something many of us have probably done at home. At first glance at this cereal box, you might think you’re getting all the monster cereals in one, but you’re not. Overall, it’s a fun idea, especially for Halloween, but it’s not quite what I think most of us wanted.

Flavor

The box promotes artificially berry-flavored frosted cereal with monster marshmallows. There’s a hint of the berry flavor but it’s really not all that strong.

I get that Count Chocula cereal might not jive with berry-flavored cereal, but let my taste buds decide that. I guess I’ll have to buy each separately and make my own mash-up.

Overall, the flavor of this cereal reminds me of a couple of past General Mills-made cereals I reviewed such as the JoJo cereal and the most recent Star Wars cereal. Or, if you want to go old school, it’s reminiscent of Ghost Busters cereal.

Final Thoughts

A good idea but a slight miss in the execution. We’ve had so many other berry-flavored cereals with marshmallows so nothing is groundbreaking. As I mentioned earlier, when you promote all the classic monster characters on the packaging, my initial thought, if you passingly glance at it in the grocery aisle is that they are all included in the cereal. Fortunately, they still sell the classic monster cereals separately too, so I think that is what I would recommend buying instead of this, especially if you enjoy Count Chocula.

Now, trick or treat, give me something good to eat!

Silly Rabbit, Nesquik is for… Canadians?

Posted on October 15, 2023 by Joe Evans

Have you ever wondered what Canadian Cocoa Puffs would look like? Swap out the loopy coo-coo bird for a cartooony rabbit and you have Nesquik cereal. Although, Cocoa Puffs are sold in Canada, but I digress.

Nesquik cereal is no longer available in the United States, so our neighbors to the north get to enjoy it. As I continue the second part of my palette tour of Canadian cereals (see the last one on Tim Horton’s Timbits), we dig into Nestle cereal.

Aesthetics

Let’s first judge a book, or in this case a cereal, by its cover. The unmistakable Nesquik branding of the blue and yellow is instant nostalgia for me, thinking back to my youth when my sister would make glasses of chocolate milk with scoops of Nesquik powder and then leave the glasses strung around the house. Then there is my memory of mom making me what I called a “malt” when she would add a couple of scoops of Nequik powder with scoops of vanilla ice cream and milk and blend it all together with a hand mixer.

As for the cereal itself, the pieces are small round mounds of chocolate textured cereal, similar to what you’d come to expect if you have ever eaten Cocoa Puffs or any other similar chocolate cereal. The cereal box does advertise that the cereal will turn your milk into chocolate milk, and I will say it does a good job. I’m not one who typically drinks their cereal milk, but this did taste like Nesquik chocolate milk.

Snackability

Nesquik cereal is. a good size to snack on, but the chocolate flavor might limit how much you could snack on, unless you really, really like cocoa flavor. I will say that there is a nice, satisfying crunch with each piece.

Structural Integrity

Due to the small condensed nature of the cereal, the cereal maintains a crunch even after more than 15 minutes in milk. After about 10 minutes, the center was crunchy, but the outer layer of the cereal was beginning to soften, but there was a crunch nonetheless.

Cereal Concept

The concept is a little meh to me, especially since Cocoa Puffs seems to have far more brand power than Nesquik cereal, and is sold in a lot of places. I know there are other Nesquik cereals around that jazz up this version, so maybe that would help. In the end, it comes down to whether you prefer a friendly bipedal rabbit or an unhinged cracked-out cocoa-loving bird.

Flavor

If you are a fan of chocolate/cocoa-based cereal then this is right up your alley. Although, it may not be as sweet as Cocoa Puffs, which I didn’t mind. Could I eat more than one bowl of Nesquik cereal in one sitting? Probably not, but as I mentioned previously, the fact that it does a nice job of flavoring the milk after all the cereal is eaten was an added bonus. If you ever made chocolate milk with Nesquik powder then you might be able to taste the words you’re reading.

Final Thoughts I’m not going coo-coo over Nesquik cereal. I think it does a fine job of being what it is: a chocolate-flavored cereal that may be a little more bland than Cocoa Puffs, and if that doesn’t describe Canada, I don’t know what does. (j/k Canada friends. We appreciate you, your kindness, hockey, lacrosse and maple syrup). Would I buy this cereal regularly? No, but I’m not a huge chocolate cereal fan. However, it doesn’t hurt to have something like this in your pantry’s cereal rotation when you need a little fix, or you want to go wild and mix it in with other cereal. PS: Do you know how hard it is to type the “quick” incorrectly because that’s how Nesquik uses it? I just had to go in and replace all the Nesquicks with Nesquiks. Good grief.

Find out what Tim Horton’s timbits cereal is all aboot

Posted on August 26, 2023 by Joe Evans

Canada, the big landmass of a country and neighbor to the north. The country is so big it has two national sports: hockey and lacrosse. A country that has given the world artists like Bret “the Hitman” Hart, Celine Dion, and most importantly the rapper, Snow.

Canada has also given us Tim Horton’s and subsequently Tim Horton’s brand cereal in conjunction with Post Cereals.

So today, I put on the finest mountie hat money can buy on Amazon that goes with my Canadian tuxedo, holster a bottle of maple syrup, and give you a preempted “sorie” for reading this review. With all of that out of the way, how aboot we crack open this box of Tim Horton’s timbits birthday cake cereal and get into the review, eh?

Aesthetics

The packaging gives you that unmistakeable red and white Tim Horton’s branding and replicates the store’s carrier box you get when ordering timbits/donut holes. Also, it’s double-sided with one side fully in French. Now, I know how to say “birthday cake” in French. Thanks, Tim Horton’s!

The cereal itself looks like what happens when you have a box of Kix cereal in a bowl and then someone with a fresh ground pepper dispenser spreads crushed sprinkles all over it until you say when.

Snackability

If you enjoy sweet, crunchy cereal then this one is a solid choice for snacking. Think of it as the crunch berries from Cap’n Crunch, in terms of size and texture of these little cereal balls, sans the berry flavor. If you have kids eating this cereal, just make sure their chompers are well developed so they can get through the crunchiness.

Structural Integrity

Due to the small condensed nature of the cereal, timbits birthday cake cereal is decently strong and compact.

After 10 minutes soaking in milk, the cereal still had a crunch in its center, although the outer layer had gotten a little mushy. So think of the milk eroding away layers of once-solid cereal.

Cereal Concept

While not a new concept, I find birthday cake-type cereal to be consistently decent. Tim Horton’s timbits birthday cake flavored cereal is reminiscent of similar ones found in the states, such as the Funfetti cereal (which I reviewed in October 2020) and the Disney 100 Confetti Cake cereal, which is also made by Post.

Flavor

Opening the bag, you get a whiff of the birthday cake right away, sans the moist part. The sprinkles don’t really add anything to the flavor, as they’re mostly there just for decoration. When adding milk, and letting the cereal soak up some of it, I think you get more of that spongy cake taste, if that makes any sense.

Final Thoughts Having tried other similar cereals, as mentioned above, this one was sweet enough, but not in a way that’s offensive to your taste buds, and when in milk, it certainly dilutes some of that sweetness. Perhaps my review of Tim Horton’s timbits birthday cake cereal is more kind than my Funfetti one, but that’s probably because of the branding. If you know one thing about me, it’s that I’m a sucker for novelty (hence this cereal blog), so you could have put sand from Wasaga Beach in a bag and slapped Tim Horton’s branding on it and I probably would have semi-enjoyed it. Plus, now I know more French thanks to reading this cereal box. Before, all the French I knew was the Canadian National anthem in French and English (shoutout to fifth grade for making us learn that) and items on the French Cafe menu. In closing, if you do happen to come across this cereal and try it and don’t like it, then I’ve got two words for you:

KitKat as a cereal? Gimme a break…

Posted on July 16, 2023 by Joe Evans

General Mills brings us another cereal that I don’t know if anyone asked for, but perhaps dreamed about as a child?

I’m assuming most of us have enjoyed a KitKat before. Those sweet crispy wafters melded together by milk chocolate create one of my favorite candy bars, and apparently one of Kourtney Kardashian’s as well, although I don’t dissect mine and eat it in the most complicated way possible.

Now, General Mills has attempted to replicate one of our favorite candy bars in the form of cereal, minus the ease of breaking off just one bar at a time. But does it succeed, or is it just like all the other novelty chocolate cereals? Gimme a break. Gimme a break. Break me off a piece of that cereal review below.

Aesthetics

The thick, chocolatey squares look like rice chex on a human growth hormone. Or, perhaps a less pleasing description would be like large, dry dog food. As for the packaging, the bold KitKat font on top of that bright red branding only makes me hungry for an actual KitKat bar at 9:30 a.m., as I write this review. Hey, I’m an adult and make my own choices, and I can choose to eat candy for breakfast, no matter how unhealthy that may be. But I digress.

Snackability

Fine for a couple of pieces, but not something I could see myself snacking on while on a road trip. Also, the pieces are somewhat bulky, so smaller children may have trouble eating the square pieces dry, and even adults may struggle if they find themselves eating too many pieces of this cereal at once.

Structural Integrity

This is the category where this cereal really shines. In fact, I can’t recall the last cereal I gave a 4 spoon rating to for structural integrity. Due to the size and puffed-out shape of the cereal, I would have thought it would be soggy faster, but after 5+ minutes of soaking in milk, it still maintains a crunch. Even when I took the last bite in the bowl, the cereal still had some substance to it.

Flavor

If you have had other chocolate/cocoa cereals, you will know what to expect with KitKat cereal. For instance, you will get that same cocoa flavor and aftertaste you get from Cocoa Puffs, Cocoa Pebbles, Hershey Kisses cereal and those alike. It’s not something I can eat bowls upon bowls of, but if you have a hankering for chocolate cereal this will do. I will say the flavor definitely lessens as soon as you add milk to the bowl.

Cereal Concept

Like looking at comic books from decades ago and then transforming them into movies, all anyone needs to do to generate an idea for a novelty cereal is a jaunt down the candy aisle of a store. “Hmm, Twing Bing cereal. Maybe that could be a thing?” or “Whatchamacallit? More like WhyNotCerealIt”

Final Thoughts

If you expect this to taste like a bowl of miniature KitKat bars, then you’ll be disappointed.

If you expected a chocolate-flavored cereal with a crisp crunch, like the satisfying break of a KitKat bar then that is more in alignment with what was executed.

Anyway you put it, whether it’s the traditional KitKat candy bar, or if it’s KitKat cereal, ice cream, or whatever else is in the pipeline, I think it’s safe to assume that what will forever resonate with us is the KitKat jingle.

ICEE cereal packs the flavor minus the brain freeze

Posted on July 9, 2023 by Joe Evans

Kellogg’s continues to pump out novelty cereals. This time, it’s a berry-flavored cereal inspired by the childhood classic cool beverage, the ICEE. So, is this cereal everything we love about ICEE minus the brain freeze and brightly red or blue tongue? In short, sort of.

But before we dive into the cereal review, let’s take a look at the history of ICEE. (don’t say you never learned anything by reading these reviews)

The ICEE company was started in 1967 in Los Angeles and after some acquisitions and expansion, it has since grown to be the No. 1 frozen beverage brand worldwide.

Good question. I don’t know, but I figured it’d stretch this review out a little longer. Now, let’s grab our spoons and dig into this cereal.

Aesthetics

Upon opening the bag, you definitely will get a strong whiff of the cherry and blue raspberry, the OG ICEE flavors. As you can see from the photo, the cereal is more pink and pale blue than red and blue raspberry. Otherwise, just your typical bag of small puff cereal. The packaging did make me want to go to a movie theater and settle in with an ICEE though.

Snackability

I was pleasantly surprised that I think I enjoy this cereal dry than in milk. The small puffs easily fill the palm of your hand so you can toss them back in your mouth hole. It’s certainly sweet though, so it’s good for a quick sweet fix, but I wouldn’t do more than a couple scoops.

Structural Integrity

The pieces were not as airy as I expected, as if you were eating Kix, but at the same time they were not as crunchy as a Crunchberry. I’d describe the ICEE cereal as more like a Cocoa Puff in structure but with a berry flavor.

Because of this, after a minute, you will find the morsels starting to get soggy. After about 5 minutes, the exterior of the cereal was a little mushy, like an outer layer while the center of the cereal still had a slight crunch.

Flavor

You will certainly taste the cherry and blue raspberry as promised on the box, but the strength of those flavors dissipates once milk is added, compared to eating the cereal dry.

The cereal box also has the written claims that you will “feel the freeze” and that it “cools your mouth as you eat.” I thought to myself, “Of course, it cools your mouth as you eat because you’re using cold milk. Only an animal would use room-temperature milk.”

After first trying the cereal dry, I did feel a unique sensation coating my tongue. It’s hard to explain, but maybe it has to do with the ingredient that is supposed to help cool your mouth with each bite. According to the ICEE promotional copy, the new cereal utilizes an innovative ingredient that cools your mouth as you eat, imitating the familiar sip of a cold ICEE beverage.

Cereal Concept

I will always be a fan of trying to make cereal out of something nostalgic. It does prove a point that if you can make cereal based on a foamy beverage, we can easily make cereal based on other drinks. What about a LaCroix cereal or Jarritos cereal? The possibilities are only limited by your imagination.

Final Thoughts

Overall, I didn’t hate ICEE cereal. It’s not something I’d buy or eat regularly, given so many other options. However, I do tend to lean more toward sweet and berry-flavored cereal over chocolate ones.

While the cereal is supposed to cool your mouth with each bite, it just doesn’t satisfy the missing feeling of the rush you get when not knowing when that brain freeze is going to hit you when drinking an actual ICEE. I just don’t recommend an ICEE with a bowl of ICEE cereal though, unless you really are feeling frisky. Then by all means you do you and please report back, because I want to know what that combination tasted like and I also want to make sure you’re okay.

Is Nutty Buddy cereal a bust?

Posted on February 25, 2023 by Joe Evans

Kellogg’s and Little Debbie have collaborated again to turn a childhood snack into cereal form. In addition to Oatmeal Creme Pies and Cosmic Brownies, the brands have concocted a Nutty Buddy cereal.

When opening the box and cereal bag, you definitely can smell a scent that reminds me of some sort of latte I’ve ordered. But the question we’re left with is whether or not it is executed well, so let’s find out.

Aesthetics

I’m mainly giving it four spoons because I’m a sucker for bright, vibrant colors on the packaging and it excellently replicates the classic Nutty Buddy snack box branding. The one thing I was leery about was the shape of the cereal pieces because they don’t exactly look like the chocolate and peanut butter wafer bars that we’ve grown accustomed to. The more I stared at the cereal the more I couldn’t decide if they looked like mini bread loaves or dry dog kibble.

Snackability

As mentioned above, the large cereal pieces make it difficult for easy snackability, but at least the pieces are light and aren’t dense, so they’re easily chewable, just as long as you aren’t stuffing more than a couple pieces in at a time. But for me, good snackability is being able to grab a handful of cereal and toss it in your mouth without worrying if you are going to choke or hurt your mouth or jaw. I’m not about to try and look like a squirrel who is loading up my mouth in preparation for winter.

Structural Integrity

You’re going to notice a theme here, as one of the cereal’s missteps is the size of the morsels. The large loaf-like blocks start to absorb milk relatively quickly due to how light they are, so after a few bites, you’ll notice less of a crunch, especially the pieces at the bottom.

Cereal Concept

I will always applaud the attempt of trying to turn unhealthy snacks into unhealthy cereal (I’m still waiting for Little Debbie Christmas Tree snack cake cereal). While the intention was good at trying to sucker me into nostalgia and curiosity, I still can’t get past the size of the cereal.

Flavor

I don’t give out half spoons, otherwise, I would give this category 2.5 spoons. While I mentioned earlier about the smell of the cereal when I opened the bag, the smell doesn’t translate to a strong flavor. Eating the cereal dry, it’s not as chocolate-tasting as I was imagining. From my experience, chocolate-flavored cereal usually tastes like cocoa powder, but this is much more subtle. However, I could definitely taste the hint of a peanut butter wafer. Overall, this was one of the times when I wished the chocolate cereal tasted a little stronger because the flavor only lessens in milk.

Final Thoughts

Of the Little Debbie cereals I’ve had so far, this is probably the less offensive to the tastebuds. It’s a pretty neutral ride from the first bite to the last.

If you haven’t guessed by now, assuming you’ve made it this far into the review and didn’t quit reading, the biggest issue I have is how large the cereal pieces are.

If I was choosing the original snack vs. a cereal made to replicate the snack for breakfast, I’d rather just rip open a Nutty Buddy pack and have them for breakfast because I’m an adult and can make my own choices (even if they’re not the most nutritious)

Bonus Section: Food for Thought

Did you know that Nutty Bars first hit grocery shelves in 1964?

And now let’s address the elephant in the room.

Now known as Nutty Buddy, the name changed to that after decades of being Nutty Bars, around 2016.

Lucky Charms cookies are magically mid

Posted on February 23, 2023 by Joe Evans

You may not have noticed in the refrigerated section of your local grocery store that Pillsbury has collaborated with Lucky Charms to create take-and-bake cookies using the famous cereal’s marshmallows. Basically, think your typical chocolate chip cookies but with marshmallows instead.

And while this isn’t a cereal to review per se, it’s cereal adjacent, so I’m here to offer my takes, in case you want to purchase it for yourself, your kids, or a friend of a friend whose cousin is three times removed from your step-aunt.

Based on the packaging and the cookie depicted, I was optimistic about these dozen cookies. Although, I may have eaten a few pieces in raw cookie dough form, so I could get an idea of how they were raw. Plus, the packaging even encourages you to eat the cookie dough, because they use heat-treated flour and pasteurized eggs. You can learn more about Pillsbury’s process at pillsbury.com/SafeToEatRaw.

While it was nice to be able to eat the cookie dough raw and not have to play salmonella roulette, I wasn’t a fan of the marshmallows in this form. They definitely added a cotton candy-like sweetness to the flavor and a crunch like you were chiseling off pieces of Valentine’s Day candy hearts. So, I prefer eating raw cookie dough with chocolate chips in it instead.

On to the baked product.

First off, I suggest waiting to eat the cookie after it has cooled enough and solidified, in order to get an accurate flavor of how the marshmallows play into the cookie dough.

Out of the oven, the Lucky Charms marshmallows looked more like miniature Peeps got incinerated into cookie dough, or that these cookies have really pastel moles that look suspicious and should be checked by a dermatologist.

You can’t taste the marshmallows nearly as much as when the dough is raw, but for me, I preferred the baked cookie.

Overall, much like cereals that try and do wacky mashups, the idea of Lucky Charms cookies is a cute novelty, but it may be trying too hard, almost as hard as trying to make fetch happen. Let’s leave these marshmallows in our cereal bowl, or in Rice Krispies-style bars.

Red, White & Blue Crunch: a patriotic punch to your palate

Posted on July 2, 2022 by Joe Evans

Aesthetics

I don’t have a graphic for 2.5 spoons, so 3 it is. The box is very seasonal with its color scheme and fireworks graphics. I feel like they missed the mark by not dressing the Captain like Uncle Sam.

Rather than the usual pillow-shaped cereal that we’re familiar with from Cap’n Crunch, they went with a star shape, although they look more like starfishes to me. Red, white and blue starfishes swimming in a bowl of milk.

Snackability

Most people associate Cap’n Crunch with scraping the roof of your mouth like you would scrape wallpaper that’s been in your parents’ dining room for the better part of 30+ years. But unlike the people who chose that wallpaper, this cereal still has taste.

Another benefit is that the star shape of it makes it a little airier and not like you’re chomping on gravel. I actually think you could make some solid Rice Krispies bars with this cereal.

Structural Integrity

Because the star shape of the cereal has made it less dense, the cereal does get a little mushy in milk faster than the usual version. But as I mentioned in the previous category, at least this cereal won’t wreck your mouth as bad.

Cereal Concept

Meh. That’s the word I would use to describe the concept of this cereal. It’s nothing unique or innovative. It’s just a seasonal version of the same Cap’n Crunch we’re used to, and for me, I’d rather have the OG.

Flavor

Have you had Cap’n Crunch before? If you have it tastes just like that. I think they should have made the blue and red pieces taste more like blueberry and raspberry, respectively. It would have differentiated this cereal more from its usual lineup.

Final Thoughts

Red, White & Blue Crunch is just Cap’n Crunch dressed up in a costume of star shapes and painted different colors. Do I feel more American and festive after eating a bowl of it? No, I feel like a 40-year-old grown man eating novelty cereal all in the name of entertaining content. (I need better hobbies)